Ian Pearson rides the Rhonde Picarde

Well I’ve been to France again and ridden a sportive so that means it must be overly long report time!!

This event is the finale of the Grand Trophee, a season long series including Beaumes de Venise Mt Ventoux, Les 3 Ballons and La Marmotte amongst others (see www.sportcommunication for all the details). The Ronde is based around the Somme bay and starts and finishes in Abbeville, conveniently the town where my wife comes from.

Whilst most UK sportives labour the point that “it’s not a race”, “you against the road” etc the rides in this series are actively marketed as races and attract some fairly big names. That’s not to say that the likes of you and I can’t get around and with nearly 2000 starters there’s always going to be a group to slot into.

This year we had decided to do the shorter ‘Senior’ route. This still weighs in at 135km and 1000m of climbing but doesn’t include the sting in the tale (the climb from Etoile to Long, 10% 2km in the last 5km of the race) of its bigger brother the 185km ‘Master’.

You ca see the route here http://www.toporoute.com/cgi-bin/getSavedRoute.cgi?routeKey=MOFKNNWEEYNUKFW

As this is shorter than most of the sportives I have done I was really hoping to get the Gold Brevet which required a finishing time of 4hrs 22mins for my age group.

As with most of my tales things started badly. In my enthusiasm to get hold of the new club kit we left it far too late to hit the road and caught all of the usual M25 traffic. Despite Phill’s best efforts, including topping 120mph in a diesel Espace, we missed our boat and had to sit it out in Dover until the next crossing. We finally got to my in laws at 12.30am. Combine this with the need to sign on before the race and the fact that France is one hour ahead meant we got little more than 4 hours sleep.

So, Saturday morning 6.15am (French time) jump out of bed, open the blinds…oops...the blinds are already open, it’s still pitch black outside and there’s a thick autumnal fog. Why am I doing this again?

We got ourselves kitted up and ready to go and then realised just how cold it was outside. Despite under layer, arm warmers, gilet and copious lashings of deep heat we were still frozen and we needed to ride over one of the biggest local climbs just to get to the start. So away we went plodding up Cote Verte in the 23 sprocket. Who’s idea was it not to drive?

We got to the sign on just after 7am, one hour before the depart to be greeted by the sight of several hundred cyclists already jostling for position on the start line. We quickly dived into the HQ signed on got our numbers and goodie bag. A quick peak inside revealed a pair of arm warmers (cool), energy bars (cool), some apple puree (very French) and a Ronde Picarde bumper sticker (maybe not). So away we went to the start line, elbows out protecting our 600 and something starting position…..and there we waited.

We spent getting on for an hour waiting there trying to make out what was coming over the PA (a mixture of useless info and hilarious French jokes!). Then without warning the gun went off…..and nothing happened. Well at least the front of the bunch moved but it took several minutes before we even started scooting. However, 10 mins or so later we rolled over the timing mat and we were away.

Because of the slow start the bunch was fairly strung out and everyone was hammering at 30mph plus to try and close gaps, just what you need on a cold September morning. This continued for the first 10km until we reached Bray les Mareuil and the first climb of the day. Now I know this climb pretty well it’s about 6% and a couple of km long. It doesn’t look like much from the bottom but it’s a really heavy road and it soon saps the legs. Sure enough we started picking up places half way up as those in front of us realised their error in going at it too hard.

Once over the top there was a sharp left turn, a 45mph descent and then we hit a brick wall. I’ve never ridden this climb before and I know the reason why. I was near to stationary in the 25 sprocket. Obviously the hill blew the field to pieces and the fact that it was followed by three other nearly as steep climbs meant we were unlikely to see the front of the bunch again. Think Tour of Flanders and you’ve probably got a good idea of the terrain during the first 50km.

After that the course settles down a bit, larger groups formed and you start to get a bit of chatter. It’s really amazing how many Brits ride this event, in pretty much every group there was somebody English.

At around the 50km mark the course joins the route of the Cote Picarde, a sportive we rode in April this year, that means it includes the climb at Dargnies. This ones not all that bad 8% for just over 1km but we were in a group of around 50 that was working really well and I didn’t want to get dropped. So at the bottom of the climb I made sure I was on the front and drove hard up the climb surprising myself when I reached the top still at the front. Unfortunately when I looked around Phil was no longer there and as I drifted back through the wheels I realised he wasn’t in the group at all, nor was he amongst the stragglers climbing behind. He had started to bonk at the bottom of the climb and had decided to ride up well within himself. Unfortunately this meant we had lost the group and I had been waiting on the side of the road for around 5 mins (remember this its important later).

With my brother on my wheel I did what I could to try and pick up some riders and get another group together. There was a slight tale wind and we were happily rolling through at 25mph picking up stragglers who either sat in or went straight out the back. By the time we hit the coast we had a group of 15 but only one person working, me!

The character of the course really shifts during the middle 50km as you ride along the coast, through dunes and seaside resorts. It’s noticeably flatter and for that reason it comes as more of a shock as you swing through Ault when you are hit by the steepest climb of the day. This climb heads straight up onto the headland and whilst it is no more than 500m long its easily 15%, provides the main photo opportunity and is lined on both sides with spectators. Bearing that in mind it was the ideal place for me to drop my chain and fall off the bike!!! If that wasn’t bad enough the climb is so steep that even in the 25 sprocket I couldn’t get going again. Fortunately a spectator gave me a shove, pro wheel change style, and I was off with shouts of ‘cretin’, Putain, les Anglais’ and ‘idiot’ ringing in my ears. All this directly in front of the official photographer, sweet! I was so hacked off I caught my group before they reached the top.

By now the conditions had completely changed and the sun was baking us alive. We had finally been caught by a faster group and had some help on the front. At 106km the ‘Senior’ route heads back towards Abbeville and my thoughts turned more to my time and the sprint finish. Unfortunately my £5 bike computer from JJB sports was telling me that I had been riding for 12hrs 53mins so I decided to concentrate on winning the sprint from this bunch and worry about the time when we got there. All was going well, tucked in nicely 5 off the front 3km to go, last climb of the day, feeling good. The plan, attack of the top and hope I have enough left to win the sprint from whatever’s left. I was just looking to jump when Phill dropped his chain. Ok don’t panic, wait for him, pace him back on then use him as a lead out. Nope he’s completely stuffed it and had to get off to put the chain back on. Oh well I still got to beat him in a 2up. There’s not many times I’ve been able to say that in the last 10 years.

On arriving at the finish village you realise just how well organised this event is. You get a free hot meal, there’s a beer tent and a real carnival atmosphere. However, that was incidental so it was straight over to the ‘Retour Puce’ to find out if I’d made gold.

Well the answer is No!! 4hrs 28 mins at 31kmh, I’d missed it by 6 mins (remember the 5 mins waiting at the side of the road). Have to admit I was totally gutted plus we then had to ride the 15km back to the house.

Not at all mad with my brother, he would have done the same for me and has done in the past, it’s just annoying when you get that close.

Cracking event, probably not as racy as the Cote Picarde because of the early hills but all the same a great weekend and only a short hop over the water. Would definitely recommend it to anyone as the course is tough enough to provide a challenge but there are no stupid long climbs that make you want to be sick.

Again the marshalling is amazing, you literally own the roads for the day. There’s even several of those cool yellow Mavic motorbikes with the wheels on the back. I wanted to puncture just to get one. When you think you get all this, don’t forget the goody bag and free meal, for just 32 euros it really can’t be beaten.

Next year it will be gold and on the Master!!!